4am rambles

Sometimes I miss The Explorer so badly it hurts.
And sometimes I wonder why I moved to Seattle.
Why I left a town I adore and parents I love and the man of my dreams to move to a city I only pretend to know well.
Why I’m paying WAY too much for rent compared to what I could be paying elsewhere.
Why I have to spend 45 minutes on the bus every day because street parking is a nightmare and it costs too much to park at my building.

But then my roommate comes home from a party at 1am and we walk through bar central on Capitol Hill to buy hot dogs and fried pickles and then steal dvds from the boys down the hall and I remember how wonderful being a broke wannabe college kid can be.

I may miss D with every bit of me. And I may pay more than I’d like for rent. And I may not be able to dance as much as I’d like because I have to work all the time and classes cost too much.
But I love Seattle.
And I love Becky.
And I know this is exactly what I should be doing. Because I’m 23 and not yet married. Because Boulder wouldn’t accept my application because my high school closed two weeks after I graduated. Because x, y, and z have led me to exactly now.

I’m glad I didn’t let my fear get in the way for once.

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